


SigFigs Tik Tok: More at Eight

by Frog_that_writes



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Humour, They're all stupid, Tik Tok, everything but the dialogue is italicized, i might change that later, idk what tags to add to this, idk why i wrote this, it's literally just them being stupid chaotic teens, like just an obscene amount, severe abuse of italics, thats the most cursed tag ive ever written, this is maria's fault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 09:33:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23849002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frog_that_writes/pseuds/Frog_that_writes
Summary: The Bad Kids share a tik tok account. It's a disaster in every sense of the word.
Relationships: The Bad Kids - Relationship, The absolute fucking nightmare that is the bad kids parents all dating
Comments: 5
Kudos: 133





	SigFigs Tik Tok: More at Eight

The official Sig Figs tik tok account was not very active. They streamed nearly every week, posted at least weekly on their instagram, and uploaded occasionally to youtube, but the tik tok was usually reserved for whenever they had a short clip of one of them being dumb to upload. It wasn’t even truly a Sig Figs account, more of a Bad Kids one. Their followers were mostly people who had found them through the band, but there were a few who found their videos, however sparse they may be, genuinely funny. 

For some reason. 

-

_ A dark-skinned half elf and a red-haired human are standing in the middle of what appears to be a living room, all the furniture but the rug underneath of them having been pushed against the walls. There is music playing, and the view slowly zooms in on a crystal laying on a table, showing that it is where the music is coming from. The view zooms out again, and we see the half elf gesturing to the human. _

“C’mon Kristen, it’s not that hard, it’s a 3/4 rythym, shake, shake, then turn.”  _ He demonstrated what was clearly meant to be a simple part of a dance routine, and pointed to the human. _

“Fabian.”  _ The human groaned, and the camera zoomed in once more, this time on her face, showing that she looked sweaty, exhausted, and frustrated.  _ “It’s never going to happen.”

_ Another zoom, this time onto the face of the half elf. He looks slightly offended.  _

“How are we supposed to get tik tok famous if you won’t even practice?”

“We don’t.”  _ The human deadpanned, sounding done. She turned towards the wall, and the camera zoomed in towards the crystal, presumably what the human was planning on turning off. _

“Not with that attitude!”

“Oh, I wouldn’t worry.”  _ A voice spoke from off screen. The two looked up in surprise, clearly suggesting they had no idea they were being recorded.  _ “I’m sure you’ll get famous some other way.”

“Adaine!”  _ The half-elf yelled.  _ “What are you doing here?”

“Just hanging around.”  _ The camera jostled slightly, as though the person holding it shrugged. It began to zoom in once more on the half-elf’s face. _

“I’m going to-”

_ He took off in a sudden sprint towards the camera, causing the voice to shriek and begin running in the opposite direction. A second set of footsteps joined the half-elfs with a victory cry, abruptly cut off by a thud and the sound of someone swearing in pain. The camera was still zoomed in, pointed now at the floor and occasionally showing the feet of the crystal’s holder. They continued up a flight of stairs. _

“Shit! Fabian, avenge me!”

“Adaine, get back here!”

“You’ll never catch me alive!”

_ The voice from off camera suddenly began speaking an incantation, and the camera was jostled as they moved their hands, before the view suddenly ascended a few feet as they were midway up the flight of stairs. The camera pointed down at the half-elf who was now red-faced and panting, staring up at the camera in anger. _

“Adaine? What are you-”  _ Another voice came from off-screen, speaking in an accent similar to that of the person holding the camera.  _ “Ah, I was not informed there would be shenanigans today. I’m going back to our room.”

“No!”  _ The half elf shouted in complaint, looking in the direction the voice had come from.  _ “Allewyn, help me out here.”

“No, I don’t think I will, you children have fun.”

_ The half-elf blew a raspberry at the person offscreen, and it was echoed by the person holding the camera. The human from before appeared through the doorway behind the half-elf, limping slightly. _

“Fabian? Did you catch her and delete the-”  _ She cut herself off as she looked up.  _ “Oh, never mind. Miss Elven Oracle, two can play at that game.”  _ She began speaking an incantation, one that a magic user would likely recognize as the words for dispell magic. The person holding the camera clearly did, because she quietly muttered “oh god” to herself and began attempting to fly back towards the ground. The video ends as the spell does, leaving the last image to be the rapidly approaching stairs beneath the camera-holder. _

_ - _

“But the thing a lot of people don’t realize is, is that your anger can’t just be for anger’s sake, y’know? Maybe that works for some barbarians, but if you really wan’t to get into a rage, you’ve got to find something to be angry about. I personally use the concept of racism if it’s not a situation where I can use my friends being in danger, but it’s gotta be something that works for you.”

_ The camera shows a closeup of a half-orc’s face as he moved around a house, the view is shaking slightly and suggests that he is the one holding the camera. He continues giving a talk about the specifics of a barbarian going into a rage, clearly just rambling about something he thinks with no script. He continues moving through the house, allowing the viewer to realize with each passing moment that the house is as strange as it is large, random doors and windows scattered throughout a hallway in a way that makes no sense. Two exterior windows will be on either side of a door labeled as someone’s room, both showing entirely different outside views.  _

“So, yeah, I don’t want to lecture anybody, but I know a lot of people lack an understanding of how barbarians really work, and I just wanted to correct that I guess. Oh! Fig told me to make sure I mention, our tour is nearly all sold out, so if you want tickets-”

_ The half-orc cuts himself off abruptly, tilting his head to one side and listening to something. In the background, the viewer can very quietly hear the sounds of frantic mumbling. _

“Huh, weird, not that many people are here today.”  _ He continues staring in a direction slightly off screen, before turning to the camera and making a shushing motion. When he speaks again, he’s whispering.  _

“Okay, this is probably nothing but it also could another apocalypse, so I’m going to check it out, I guess.”

_ He turns the camera to point forward towards the door he is walking towards rather than his face. As he gets closer, the muttering gets slightly louder. The half-orc speaks even quieter now, as he points the camera back at his face once more. _

“If I die and this becomes some sort of found footage, donate my net worth to charity again.”

_ The camera points forward again, showing a green hand easing open a door knob. The muttering becomes much louder as the door opens quietly. The camera is pointed at the bottom of a desk and the floor until the half-orc holding the crystal points it upwards, showing a well-dressed but frazzled looking goblin standing on top of the desk. He is turned away from the viewer, looking at what appears to be an extremely large cork board, covered in pictures with masses of red string connecting them.  _

“Riz?” 

_ The half-orc speaks with clear confusion in his voice, not very loudly but not whispering either. The goblin whips around to stare at him and hisses. The half orc begins lowering the crystal. _

“Okay, I think it’s probably break time-”

_ The goblin hisses again and the video abruptly cuts off. _

_ - _

“Confusingly related sound off!”  _ The lead singer of the SigFigs has the camera pointed at herself as the video starts, but then turns it around to show a group of teens of various races, all about the same age, sitting around a living room, perched on furniture and holding books or crystals suggesting they had been previously occupied. _

“What? Fig, are you recording?”   
“Shh, Gorgug, you’re not confusingly related to any of us.”

“And I thank Cassandra for it.”

“Speaking of Cassandra, let’s start with you Kristen!”  _ The human, who had gone back to typing on her crystal looked up at the sound of her name. The camera zoomed in on her.  _

“Huh? Oh, uh, my sorta-dad but not really because that would be weird is Adaine’s adopted dad, who’s dating your mom. That’s about it. I’m only a step more related than Gorgug.”

“Adaine!”  _ Fig yelled, zooming in on an elven wizard’s face. _

“Like Kirsten said, Jawbone adopted me and is dating your mom, so if they get married that makes us step sisters. And Kristen is basically Jawbone’s ward, so she’s practically also my step sister.”

“Okay, let’s kick it up a notch. Riz!”  _ The goblin, who had been completely ignoring the conversation up until this point, with his head hunched as he frantically typed on a laptop, looked up and towards the camera. _

“My mom is dating your dad- well, biological dad,”  _ he said, not exactly sounding thrilled.  _ “And they keep  _ kicking me out  _ every time he ‘visits’ because our apartment is the size of a  _ shoe box  _ without a demon over twice our size trying to fit in it!”

“Ew, don’t put quotation marks around visit like that,”  _ Fig complained, sounding nauseous. _

“At least you don’t have to watch your step father flirt with my  _ extremely  _ recently widowed mother at your breakfast table every morning.”  _ The half-elf shot back. The camera pointed towards him when he started speaking, showing the look he was directing towards the person holding the camera.  _

“Everyone stop talking about their parents and my parents!”  _ Fig commanded, the disgust having grown in her voice.  _

“You started it!”   
_ The camera pointed once more at the goblin who was pointing towards Fig.  _

“I just wanted to explain how we’re related for our fans!”

“I think that’s enough explaining, Fig, turn the camera off.”  _ The elf said. _

“Fine.”  _ The viewer could almost hear Fig muttering something about how this was no where near as funny as she hoped it would be, and how they hadn’t even gotten into her girlfriend’s child/ parents having hooked up with her almost second step dad, before the camera shut off. _

_ - _


End file.
